My Journey & Dreams

Since I was a child I have had vivid, lucid dreams; both at night and during the day. I am afflicted (or gifted) with something called maladaptive daydreaming that I have learned to harness, craft and turn into a powerful tool. ‘Maybe because of my imagination or maybe because I have given so much time to it, I dream with so much detail I can feel myself drown or I can read what is playing on the radio. I can feel the anxiety build in my stomach as the tidal wave approaches or feel the softness of a cat walk by. I can feel emotion as well as environment. Not only are my dreams colorful and vivid, but lucid. I become so excited I remember I can fly. I have also had astral experiences that I can’t even describe.

The idea to open this store was sparked by a tincture someone else bought me to help me “ground and get direction.” During a dark winter, when I was at my lowest, I asked for guidance and often this time was spent in the bath. Immersed in lavender and epsom salt, I found my direction. I was furiously writing all of these ideas; just snippets of thoughts about a future in which I was helping others through dream guidance and ritual. Looking around me at the candles, the quartz, the sprinkles of agrimony and rose, I felt at peace. I felt a deep healing. I saw a future where I was offering herbal baths, medicine and a healing space. Where I was coaching people to allow, little by little, pieces of their trauma to unfold and blossom at night, or during rest, in a way they could feel but was safe. To wash away their fear with water or fire, in bath or candle. To allow sleep to be a solace. To be full of messages for the morning. To help them feel safe during the day. To rest. I looked at the tincture. I looked at the cup of chamomile next to me. Through herb, I thought. Through candle, through bath, through sleep. I can teach people to find their hands in dreams. To face the tidal wave.

“I felt a deep healing. I saw a future where I was offering herbal baths, medicine and a healing space.”

My focus is to sell products I have taken myself for years; products I know well and feel confident offering. I don’t sell anything I haven’t used. I have had sixteen panic attacks in the last few years which is classified as a disorder. It started shortly after my dad had a heart attack, worsened in the pandemic as I watched him die and fully erupted after his death. I’m guessing at that number. It could have been more. What is more important is the seven recent panic attacks I didn’t have. It’s so alienating to know that at any moment, or based on specific circumstances (driving over a bridge, having a change in medical condition), can trigger this eruption in emotion, shaking, shivering, shallow breath, a feeling of being cold, a knot in stomach and nausea. And no one to really understand. Panic requires stillness and breathing but herbs help. Magic helps. People help more but sometimes you’re alone.

I want to teach others what I’ve learned about my own healing and my path of divination. To offer services of guidance as well. To share my rituals. To share how I developed such an intense dream practice and what I have learned from dreams. I also want to share my sexual healing which may be indirectly related to sleep, but I have great experience being a beauty and sex industry worker for years. My sexual practice includes both healing of the somatic sensations (being open and catering to sexual satisfication, being open to receiving without giving, being open to giving without receiving, being open to “not finishing”), as well as using sexual completion for manifestation. Saying “I am…”, “I have…”, and “This… is mine.” I use sexual magic to arrive closer to the power of Lilith who opens me up to receiving more of what I want. My herbs and tinctures are just a guiding tool. My rituals go further into detail. Sexual healing is an important part of recovery.

It’s best to walk into an herbal practice with an open mind. Start slow and ask the plant to show you.

I trained in herbalism for a year and have been studying on my own for seven more years. I only sell products that I have experience using and I don’t claim to cure anything, only to offer some assistance. I do not diagnose. Typically, I err on the cautious side and encourage people to begin with a less is more attitude. Instructions are included with every product. I encourage you to do your own research as well.